"Thank Me Later 10 million copies shipped and gone" -Drake

For awhile before Drake's new album Thank Me Later came out all I knew were the names of the songs, this what came to mind....

1. Fireworks- The month after Sept 11 we went to the fair and a sudden burst of fireworks scared me so much that I thought a bomb had went off. I finally found out what it means when they say your whole life flashes before your eyes because it really did at that moment.
2. Karaoke- Last summer when my mom, sis and I would do karaoke every weekend...fun times!
3. The Resistance- I figured it was a song about the early resistance Drake faced in the music industry
4. Over-This was his single he used to promote the album I had already heard it so I just thought about the song itself
5. Show Me a Good Time-  The two concerts of his that I attended which definitely showed me a good time!
6. Up All Night-I actually thought about the one all nighter I pulled last semester while writing an English paper and how I never want to stay up all night again writing
7. Fancy-it brought to mind one of my guy friends telling me he didn't want to pursue a certain girl because she was "too fancy" for him (high maintenance)
8. Shut it Down-in one of my favorite TV series, 30 Rock ,one of the main  characters will always say shit it down when something disastrous occurs on her TV set
9. Unforgettable-What I hoped I was to Drake
10. Light Up-Drake makes it no secret that he likes to smoke pot so I simply thought it was something about lighting up a joint
11. Cece's Interlude-I was blank on this one
12. Find Your Love- I was contused on this one because it seemed like such a command, Find Your Love or else!
13. Thank Me Now- I was already planning on it hahahahaha

Other.

“What are you?” is a question that has seemed to reverberate in my ears throughout most of my life.  Since my mother is German and my father is from the deep south of Alabama; my appearance cannot be linked with any particular race.  The yellow-brown hue of my skin and my thick curly hair puzzles most, and for awhile puzzled even me.

            Most of my life I struggled to fit into a world where I now realize I was born to stand out.  I made silly choices concerning friends, thinking the race of them would ultimately define my identity as well.  One of the reason's I have identified so strongly  with Drake is that he too is bi-racial. Like me his mother is white and his father is black. In interviews Drake talks about how hard it was for him to be taken seriously in the rap world because he was half white. Growing up bi-racial I think is especially hard for any child because at some point you must make the decision- do I hang out with the black kids or the white kids. It'd be nice if such a decision didn't have to be made but unfortunately that's not the case. Think about it when you look around at USC don't you usually see cliches of friends separated by race?

What do you think, am I more black or more white???

      I used to sit at home and wish I was either just white or just black because it would make life so much easier.  Kids at school would poke fun at me calling me “other,” since in their opinion I either didn’t act black enough or white enough.   At the time these comments struck me very hard, but it is my mother who I thank for making me a stronger and wiser person.  She taught me that those who can’t see past physical appearances aren’t even worth my time.  I learned that it is your actions and aspirations that ultimately define who you are and what you’ll become.   I now feel lucky to live a life that cannot be tagged with a specific label.  Though ironically I'm about to add some labels to this post...

I ♥ you mom

"I'm urgin all daughters to kiss their mothers...you're never too old to kiss and hug her" -Drake

Another similarity between myself and the rapper Drake is our intense love for our mothers. Everyone loves their mom but for some reason I feel like our love for her is a bit stronger.  Both of us never had a strong fatherly presence growing up so maybe this explains why our mothers are so important to us.  Drake's mom and dad split when he was just five so the only time he saw his father was over the summer when he would visit him at his home in Memphis, TN.  My father was in the military so he was gone for long stretches at a time and then when he finally retired he began to work for the government in Kuwait. Other than Christmas and summer break I never saw him. My mom and dad eventually divorced 2 years ago and because my dad still works overseas I still never see him.

"and to my dad even though we were apart I couldn't leave you out, you're forever in my heart " -Drake

Like Drake I love my dad but because of his absence throughout my life,  I was never able to develop the type of connection with him that I have with my mom.

"She has been the most supportive person I have ever had in my life—the only person that loves me unconditionally, really. I know a lot of people love me and I love a lot of people. But to love somebody unconditionally is different."    -Drake

                                                                                                                                                 

"Thanks to my mother for never giving up, you deserve the world now go on and live it up" -Drake

FYI Drake just recently canceled the rest of his sold out European tour to be at home with his ill mother.He probably would have been able to further advance his career had he continued touring but Drake's mother is infinitely more important to him than his career.

INSIGHT

 For awhile my dream was to move to Alaska and study bears.  I know it sounds crazy but that's really what I wanted to do.  I longed to live in the cold, rugged, wilderness of Alaska and become a bear biologist.  At first everyone  thought it was a far fetched dream but when I contacted the swim coach for The University of Alaska Fairbanks and he arranged for an all expense paid trip to Alaska; every one's jaws dropped in shock. So I flew to Alaska....and nothing there was how I imagined it to be. 

  I guess I had and idealized view of Alaska and was thoroughly unprepared to deal the reality of it. I'm not an idiot, I knew it was going be cold but somehow I didn't expect it to be 25 degrees and snowing during the first week of May. The trip itself wasn't bad and I found many aspects of Alaska that I liked which for awhile made it impossible for me to decide whether or not Fairbanks was the place I should go for college.

     However...I had my epiphany one morning while waiting for the girl who was hosting me to get back from swim practice.(NCAA rules only allow you to practice once with the team) I remember sitting on her futon staring out the open window and watching a fresh snowfall coat the cars below.  The breeze made me shudder and the grey sky brought on a a sudden feeling of gloom and depression. At that moment I wanted more than ever to return to SC where it was 85 degrees and sunny.  I knew then I couldn't do it and I instantly texted my mom and told her that this school wasn't for me.  She was relieved because she was never a fan of the idea of me going to school so far from home. I had no second thoughts about my decision and it was probably the biggest insight of my life.  I like the warmth and would hardly ever get to see it in the cold, bleak city of Fairbanks.



view from apt